Thoughts on My First Spanking Party 150 150 admin

Thoughts on My First Spanking Party

I’ve been to quite a few spanking parties. I love them. My first time attending one made a damn lasting impression. This was one of the smaller parties found through Fetlife. There are bigger ones like The Lone Star Spanking Party

Here are some things that I can still remember about it:

Is this real life?

I was absolutely floored that this even existed. It was like a dream land. I tried to play it cool, but I don’t think I could hide how in awe I was that this place was real. A lot of the fantasies and desires I tried to push down, hide, and suppress were in full, shameless expression here.

I remember having this overwhelming feeling like “This is exactly where I belong”.

Another social bet pays off

I had struggled trying to grasp the concept of passive income. It seemed like something pie-in-the-sky magical and unreal. Then, I went to a workshop and got into a closed room with several people who were making a full time income from passive income. It grounded the loftiness of it in my mind. Right then I got to action, and not too soon after that workshop I started making passive income consistently through passive sales on Amazon Kindle and Audible.

It tripped me out that the problem actually got solved socially, so I went to bet again on the social element in after struggling with being overweight pretty much my entire life. It ended up working the exact same way! I lost over 100 lbs being in that group and helping other people too. I loved it.

So this is why I attended a spanking party in the first place….and it paid off again! The same way! I had already made 2 bets socially that really payed off well and I know that would serve me for the rest of my life.

There were many people my age, but way more experienced in spanking

I met a lot of people that first night. The group was really welcoming to new comers. I met many people that were my age (32) but had been attending spanking parties and events and had spanking partners for over a decade. I saw that as such a good investment on their part that isn’t talked about as much. That time and experience investment will serve them for a lifetime.

I also noticed there was a clear difference between the experienced and the unexperienced. Some people left me cringing watching them and some left me super impressed at how skilled they were.

Other Random Things

  • The party sounded like a round of applause that went on for about 2 and a half hours
  • I met quite a few mentors there (and even more later at the bigger parties). Several people were willing to show you the ropes and even how to make a full time living being a professional disciplinarian.
  • All the parties I attend happen at hotels. We all try to keep things under the radar while at these hotels. I usually find someone who’s not privy to what’s going on trying to inquire and find out the secret. Someone…somewhere always tries to get the inside scoop. It’s too funny, because they ask inquisitive questions and are always met with vague, ambiguous answers if they didn’t already know about it through Fetlife.
  • I left that first night feeling fireworks in me. FIREWORKS. It lit me on fire. After attending more of these parties, I started working on sharing this social information through the format of a course called Social Expansion, which is now called Welcome Home
Destiny 2 150 150 admin

Destiny 2

Destiny 2 is a free-to-play online-only multiplayer first-person shooter video game developed by Bungie. I used to play Halo a lot back in the day (also by Bungie), and it feels with Destiny 2 they took the best parts of Halo and expanded on them…at least that’s how it feels.

I was on a coaching call yesterday, and the coach invited someone else to share what they liked about a game they were into. He also invited them to see if they could incorporate the things they liked about the game into their real life. I thought that’d be an interested exercise for me to do about game I’m into – Destiny 2.

  • It Runs Decently on a Late 2013 iMac.
    • Destiny 2 runs decently on my old iMac. When I play it’s smooth, although I do have to put it at the lowest graphics setting and there are occasional crashes.
  • It’s Free!
    • Free is cool 🙂

Here’s some things I like that can possibly…in the future (and some now)…be experienced in real life.

  • There’s a lot of space and maps to explore
    • New maps were badass in Halo, so I’m glad they have a lot of space in the game to explore different places. I remember gettin amp’d up when a new map was gonna drop in Halo.
    • Why can’t I have more exploration in real life? I know there’s this thing called Covid-19 out there, but does that have to stop me dead in my tracks from exploring everything? No. “What can I explore safely?” is the question.
  • There are a lot of guns
    • They give you LOTS of guns to choose from (over 600) and you can carry and swap out hella guns anywhere at any time. Maybe I need to buy a gun in real life? I don’t have any yet.
  • You can call your vehicle, and there are multiple vehicles to drive
    • Having a badass vehicle is one thing. Walking around exploring territory and being able to call up for your vehicle instantly to ride around in? Yooo son. That’s crazy. Engineers, we gotta make this shit happen in real life. You know how wild that would be?
  • Teamwork is pretty badass
    • Most times I don’t play unless my friends play. If friends aren’t there, it’s still cool playing with real people either against other real people or bots.
    • There are lots of ways to incorporate teamwork in projects in real life that are wins across the board.
  • There is A LOT to the game because of the dedication to customization, and there are lots of instructions and directions
    • Because there is so much to the game, they equip you with lots of direction and instruction. They give you everything you need to have a rich and full experience in the game.
    • This got me thinking…when we were born it’s almost like we started a game here on Earth. Unless your parents were hella badass, you most likely DIDN’T get everything you needed to have a rich and full experience, but those resources are more easily available now because of the internet. You can get what you didn’t grow up having, and maybe even find more things you didn’t know you needed. With the project Welcome Home I’m working on, I want to help people connect with more elements to make their lives more badass.

Overall it’s been a great game and I’m liking it. Send me a friend request on Steam (Allenx05).

Decentralized Everything 150 150 admin

Decentralized Everything

There was a time where everything was very centralized. It all came from one place. Money, media and news, information, laws, etc. They all came from a few sources. Then the internet came along and fucked that shit all up.

Youtube has instant media now. People can live stream things that are happening in REAL TIME. People can connect with others to find out information in a way they never could before or just watch a stream of Youtube videos on the subject and run it through their own discernment to find TRUE information.

Value is so subjective, and we can really explore the possibility space as to what’s valuable for other people. Like to watch YouTube videos? You watching YouTube videos is valuable to other people and they will either virtually accompany you in doing so, or watch a video of you reacting to another video. There’s a whole space of reaction channels on YouTube. For people with NO skills, the documentation of their experiments and explorations are valuable. People can follow your journey along in real time. You eating food is valuable to people.

P2P services are here now. You can rent or rent out pretty much everything you own or that someone else owns if it’s available to be rented.

Decentralized coaching? Decentralized Innovation and Funding for the Innovation? Decentralized workshops? Cryptocurrency has a space where there’s DeFi (decentralized finance!).

I’m pretty damn excited about the way things are shaping up.

I Will Be Free One Day vs. I Am Free Now 150 150 admin

I Will Be Free One Day vs. I Am Free Now

“Now this is the story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down” – Fresh Prince Theme Song

If you’re working a shitty job now purely for the money it provides, and you’re trying to save enough to start a side hustle or business or investment to ultimately save you from having to work that shitty job, then this article is for you.

In this article, I want to show you the difference in these two thought patterns as it relates to work and career, and how to move from feeling, living, and thinking “I will be free one day” to truly feeling and living “I am free now“.  This article come from lots of exploring of both sides.  I have lived both extremes, and I feel like I can help someone transition from one to the other.  Neither one is good or bad, they’ll just take you in two very different directions.

I Will Be Free One Day

You attract what you think and feel the most.  If you consistently think and feel “I will be free one day”,  then you must experience more of “I will be free one day”.  Your reality will shape itself to fit that story. In this scenario, you’re never free and you never will be – you’ll always and forever be chasing freedom one day.  It’s like the sign that says “Free Beer Tomorrow”.

If you’re in a shitty job you hate, and you’re thinking and feeling “I will be free one day”, I feel where you’re coming from.

I would think, “I’ll be free one day” all the time while I was working at all the different jobs I was working at.  I would always be working on a side business or dabbling in investing or trying to learn about passive income – all for the sake of escaping my current reality.  I would be working a job I hated then think thoughts like…

  • “If I could save up some money, then I could put it in an investment, make a lot of money and leave this job”.
  • “If I could build a business on the side, I could work on that business that would make a lot of money and leave this job”.

This line of thinking was the root cause of me living like I was stuck running around in circles.  I kept finding myself lacking money, needing a job to maintain some semblance of independence, and silently saying to myself “I will be free one day and escape all of this bullshit”.

I’ve seen other people have similar thoughts.  Here’s a popular one:

  • “If I could hit the lotto, I would win a lot of money and leave this job”.

The common denominator in these lines of thinking is escape from a current job…a current reality that you don’t want to be in.  It all stems from the thought – “I’ll be free one day”.

I Am Free Now

At any point you can inject being free now, and it works the same way.  Even injecting a little bit of embodying your freedom now will make an impact. If you consistently think and feel “I am free now”, then you must experience more of “I am free now”.  Your reality will shape itself to fit that story too if that’s your predominate thought.

One of the biggest insights that came from sitting in my own freedom was that I wouldn’t do things I hated just for the money.  If I’m really free, then I could just drop that whole line of thinking.  As a result, money comes in very easily because I’m not as needy with it.  I’m not sacrificing so much of myself for it.

Also, so many more options become visible.  An infinite amount of options are always available, but they become visible to you because you’re looking for them, and not spending so much time slaving away at a job.  For example, if you’re having problems with money, you can sit down and have the space to learn all about it.  You can sit down and learn about credit, business, the history of money, investing and being early in projects, neediness vs abundance, living well within your means, earning more, scaling, stocks, crypto, passive income etc. You can go exploring down any avenue you want!  What a badass feeling!

Living “I am free now” will lead to questions like:

  • “What do I want to do today?”
  • “Where does the energy want to go today?”
  • “What needs to be done today?”
  • “What rabbit hole do I want to go down?” (lengthy periods of freedom allows you to explore things way deeper than you can when your focus is split working a job)

In relation to your work, this way of living might elicit questions like:

  • “What is my audience needing from me right now?”
  • “How can I connect with my audience?” “
  • What do I need to be at peak performance?”

Even while you’re working a shitty job, “I am free now” can elicit questions like:

  • “How do I enhance the small amount of freedom I’m experiencing when I’m not working?”
  • “What’s one step I can do now that truly expresses and embodies my freedom?”
    • “How can I do express and embody this freedom consistently?”

Where did this line of thinking come from?

I can tell I learned “I will be free one day” from my mother.  She probably learned it from her mother.  Ultimately, I believe it comes from slavery – at least for me.  When I look at slavery in the United States, it wasn’t that long ago, we were slaves for a LONG time (350+ years), and there hasn’t been a sufficient bridge to freedom internally.  Even after the declaration to free slaves, there was still so much post-slavery slavery going on.  Former slaves had access to nothing as newly free people, so they had to keep working to survive.  I wonder at what point did we drop the frame of being slaves trying to escape?

To me, the internet has been the best bridge.  Through the internet, I can now deliver value to anyone in the world who has access to the internet.  Still, the problem is internal.  I can still create my own shitty job even on the internet if I’m still feeling like “I’ll be free one day”.

Resources that helped

Do you feel free now?  Why not?  What is a step you can take today to move towards being free now?  How can you embody freedom in this moment?

Success/Outcomes is Secondary, The Enjoyment of the Doing is Primary 150 150 admin

Success/Outcomes is Secondary, The Enjoyment of the Doing is Primary

Here was a great video by Eckhart Tolle. His answers are often so good and relevant to what I’m going through at different points in time. This video had a lot to do with how I’m planning this upcoming quarter. I loved how he talked about the relationship with the practice and the work that comes perceived success.

“The successes are nice for the ego, but the spiritual breakthroughs they come when you fail at something”.

Lessons from Meditation / Visualization 150 150 admin

Lessons from Meditation / Visualization

I’ve been doing almost a month of meditation/visualization combined. I’ve done this work before, but my visions were much smaller. Here are some things I’ve noticed usually after 30 days.

  • Life moves faster, and so it’s important to remain grounded amongst the chaos.
  • Relevant, specific, synchronistic information flies in fast. I’ve seen it come in through many directions – Youtube videos, conversations, coaching calls, a note on the ground, the first thing that plays on the radio when you turn it on (these have all happened to me). Pay attention to even the littlest things so you don’t miss out.
  • Welcome the discomfort, doubts, anxiety, confusion, frustration. New things will come. Welcome all that shows up, and don’t resist it. It will make the process flow a lot smoother. Eventually, you will get to a point where you can be ok with the beautiful range of emotions and dynamics life has to offer.
  • You begin to feel like you’re actually in your visions, so when you come out of your visualization session – you have a heightened awareness of yourself, others and reality. You’re more aware of the specific times doubts and fears are causing your own hesitation and avoidance. You’re more aware of your emotions and what’s causing them. You’re more aware of how your eating is affecting your mood/emotions (hopefully!). You’re more aware of when your emotions change. You’re more aware of what’s around you. You’re aware of the small decisions you’re making to either bring aligned things in. You’re more aware of the energy it’s draining to tolerate misalignments.
  • Even if you’ve been aware of all of the above, misalignments start to irritate you more than usual…a lot more. It becomes mandatory to create and enforce boundaries to that which is misaligned. You can feel it.
  • Trust and believe there will be a process that will show up. You might not even realize it’s a process until after you’ve gone through it. You have to trust and be willing to go step by step.
  • If you dare to dream big here, be aware of validation seeking – where you’re trying to prove to other people your vision can be real. Less defense, more surrender. Share your vision with someone who is aligned with it and could support it and make it happen…or at least move you to the next step. I find it best to share it with someone who’s already been down the exact (or very similar) path and come out the other side. They’ll do a much better job of showing you how that looks on earth for real and grounding what feels like a big dream in the sky. I’ve also seen sharing it with a supportive audience work too. They can point you to the person (or group of people) that have been through the process.
Neediness In Crypto Investing 150 150 admin

Neediness In Crypto Investing

On September 17, 2020 I received a free airdrop of 400 Uniswap tokens (UNI).  At the time of this writing, this has been the most popular airdrop to date in the crypto space.  The day I received the airdrop, the price of Uniswap was goin all over the place.  That day it was swinging at $3-$8 and ended up stabilizing around $5.  This was my first airdrop so…I thought to myself “Oh my god, free money!” and sold those 400 coins almost immediately for $1400.  I was pretty happy.

Fast forward to today (249 days later) Uniswap’s price is selling at $24.24.  Those 400 coins I sold would have been worth $9,696 had I kept them.  3 weeks ago Uniswap reached its all-time high and was valued at #44.92…so 3 weeks ago 400 Uniswap coins were worth $17,968.

Deep in the Telegram and Discord channels of different crypto coins you’ll see wild success stories and some not-so-successful ones too.

Approaching the Market

The past “me” might have beat myself up over the decision to sell those 400 coins early.  The “me” now sees so many paths to $20,000 that it doesn’t bother me as much.  The main lesson I learned was how I approach the market can affect my results and the experience overall.

I don’t believe there are any accidents.  If I’m honest with myself, I can say I sold those coins early because that’s the amount I was comfortable receiving.  At the time, I was used to receiving amounts close to $1000, but not anything close to $17,968 at all at one time.  I was used to making $800 / week working my regular job and Door Dash on the weekends.  Attracting anything above $1000 at once was way out of my comfort zone.  If I had been earning $20,000+ checks outside of the crypto space, then I would have just left that 400 coins alone.  It wouldn’t have been that big of a deal to me, and I would have given those 400 coins the time and space to grow and mature financially.

The Real Work in Investing

It made me realize that the real back-end work to investing is becoming comfortable receiving the amount of money I want from an investment OUTSIDE of that particular investment.  That way, I don’t approach any particular income stream or investment with a sense of neediness.  I wouldn’t need an investment to go up in value during my specific timeline.  It can be fun, playful, and light vs serious and stressful when a coin doesn’t do what I want it to.

If I want a million dollars from an investment, am I comfortable receiving a million dollars outside of that investment?   Would I be comfortable or ok with receiving a million dollars all at once in my day-to-day life?  If not, then a million dollars all at once might stress me the fuck out.  There was a time where after hearing that I would have been like “yeah right…give me a million dollars and see if I’m stressed out”.  It gets real though.  I’m in Telegram groups where a few people’s $100-$1000 investments are all of a sudden worth anywhere from $10K to $300k.  I see the hate and jealousy that gets thrown their way.  I see that owning a coin that shoots up in value could be stressful depending on the way they frame it.  Do you sell that coin and cash out only to see it rise 80X more in value?  Do you hold it and watch it crash to ground in value?  Do you go half and half?

  • If you do cash out…how much (if any) do you give to others?  What about homeless people you see on the street?  What about charities?
  • If you don’t cash out… are you watching the charts 24/7 to see when you should sell or what the price is currently?  Stressed when the number goes down, euphoric when it goes up?

I looked at the definition of trauma – a deeply distressing or disturbing experience.  It’s weird to think that having a lump sum of money placed in your lap can be distressing, but I can see it now.  Add to this the fact that many of those people who’ve seen their coins skyrocket in value don’t know wtf their investing in, and it was just a lucky gamble or a call from someone who does know about that coin.

Security is an Illusion

Nothing is static.  This includes investments, the value of money, the trends of different markets, etc.  There’s no need to let those fluctuations manipulate your emotions – but they will if you’re needing investments to somehow “save you” from looking at other parts of life you don’t want to address – like the job you hate that you can’t take a break from and/or the time and effort it might take to learn a skill that’s more valuable to the marketplace and one that is more enjoyable and provides you with more fulfillment.

One of the reasons the crypto space is shaking things up is people are waking up to the fact that the security they thought they had in money is being yanked from under them.  The USD has continued to decline in value while Bitcoin and Ethereum and other cryptocurrencies have risen in value over their short history.  Printing money out of thin air doesn’t help the cause for the security-in-money case. In the long term I can see the writing on the wall for fiat money.  In the short term, I don’t know wtf this shit gonna do.

I’ve noticed friends try to approach me looking for me to give them a sense of security in their crypto investments in the short term.  I decline that responsibility.  The best I can do is invite you to  be an active participant in learning about your crypto investment and also explore the idea that the best security is to learn to not need security as much…kind of like the real work in investing is learning to not need investments.  ?

BTW…This is not financial advice, and I am not a financial advisor.  I learned to say that from the Youtubers.

If You Order From DoorDash… 150 150 admin

If You Order From DoorDash…

Through Favor and DoorDash I’ve done almost 1200 deliveries combined…not to mention the extra deliveries family and friends request when they find out this is what you do.  If you order Door Dash or Uber Eats or Favor or any other P2P food delivery service follow these small tips to have a faster, smoother and cleaner delivery experience:

  • Be able to tell me how to get in your gate.
    • If you live in an apartment, please learn how to get in your own gate.  If you don’t know how to get in, then how can you expect me to?  If you don’t know how to get in your gate, please don’t order from any food delivery service until you can find out how or are willing to meet outside of the gate.  Yes, we can wait on other people to come or leave and go in behind them, but in most places that’s prohibited and we shouldn’t have to do it anyways.  It shows a total disrespect for our time.  I’m willing to bet that more often than not, you KNOW you don’t know how to get in your gate, you’re just hoping the driver can figure something out.  Please figure it out first.  Please.
    • I remember there was one time I pulled into an apartment (not realizing it was an apartment when the order first showed up).  I called the customer to ask how to get in the gate, and she didn’t know.  So I’m at the dial pad stuck…There are cars that are behind me honking at me, there’s no space to turn around or go in the exit gate, and I’m pretty upset at this point.  She then says she’s going to send someone out to pick up the food.  After a while I see someone walk towards me with a slow, smooth bop in his step (if you’ve ever watched Bruh Man from the show Martin walk, that was the walk).  WHAT ARE YOU DOING DUDE?!?!  HURRY YOUR ASS UP MAN.  THIS AINT THE TIME TO BE TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL.
    • If you live in a gated community, please let the person at the front know who I am and/or that you’re expecting a delivery.  Many times I feel like I’m crossing a border with all the identification I have to provide to them for delivering your smoothie from Sonic.  Name, license plate number, license, passport, social security, birth corticate, actual mom that birthed me, etc.
  • Give detailed directions 
    • I’m tired of driving around your horribly lit apartments at night looking for your building number.  Then I look to your directions for some semblance of guidance…it says “thanks!” or “I’m in the back”.  You only have to give the directions once.  Come on yo!
  • Put your animals away
    • Through many deliveries I’ve noticed quite a few things about the dynamic between you and your pets:
      • Your pets don’t listen to you.  As well as you think you have them trained, when you talk they pretty much ignore you…at least while I’m there.  “BACK! GET BACK! SIT!”  I see you squeeze through the door trying not to let the dog out.  The dog completely ignores this weak ass request, euro-steps you and starts sniffing me.  Then I hear you say something I don’t think any delivery driver wants to hear – “oh he don’t worry, he doesn’t bite!”.  How do you know this animal is going to do?  You can tell me what he probably will do.  You can tell me what he has or hasn’t done in the past.  You can’t tell what he’s going to do in the future.  I don’t want to hear it, and please stop saying it.  If he’s a dog with teeth, I’m going to assume he bites.
      • Some of you are way too damn intimate with your pets.  I don’t want the type of intimacy with your pets that you might have.  I don’t want your pets licking, sniffing, or biting me.  I just want to deliver the food and leave.
  • Give me the right address
    • I know.  Everyone makes mistakes, and granted this has only happened like 3 times to me, but this really is a bad one to make…the worst.  When you put the wrong address a driver either ends up looking for an address that doesn’t exist or delivering to a person that isn’t expecting an order.  I actually had a customer who didn’t speak must English at all and didn’t know her real address.  The address she gave me didn’t exist, and when I called her for directions, all she kept saying was that her place was “by the trees” *insert blank stare emoji here*.  There were literally trees everywhere.  Needless to say this food took forever to deliver, and of course I got the negative rating.  This could have all been avoided if she knew her own address BEFORE she requested someone deliver food to her.

Help me, and other delivery drivers help you.  Help us get you your food faster.