Slow Rider
Here is a snippet of a beat I ultimately want to get to final form and able to sell. I love creating music and I want to get better! Let me know if you can help with this through the contact form!
How to Get to The Next Step
If you look at goal that you deem as “big”, there can be a tendency to want to jump to achieve it instantly. Realize if we could achieve our big goals instantly, they would cease to be big goals. Enjoy the little steps to get there. Enjoy the process.
In my twelve step program, we were always encouraged to refocus to the next right action. The question we would ask ourselves is “what is the next right action to take?”. Enough of these little steps and you get to your goal.
“Progress = happiness”
Tony Robbins
This works especially well for asking questions to busy people too. If you try to ask someone who is already getting a lot of questions and feedback a big, general question, they are very likely to have already answered it somewhere because you probably weren’t the first person to ask. “What do you think about this?” for example. They might link you to something or give you a big, generic answer back. That is if they answer it at all.
Compare that with showing some commitment and asking them for the next step you should take. Something to the effect of “I did X as you suggested, and Y happened, if you were me, what would your next step be?”.
If you have a goal, what’s a small action you can take now that would get you a little closer. Keep getting a little closer and eventually you will get there.
How to Build Momentum In Life
I always tell people if you want to know the secret to happiness, I can give it to you in one word: progress
Tony Robbins
If you’re having a problem with momentum, go out and get a small victory and celebrate it. Rinse and repeat.
Documenting can also come in handy. Sometimes you feel like you aren’t going anywhere, but if you’ve documented everything along the way, you can look back and see where you’ve come from and all the little steps you took.
This is a foundation of skill building. When I started in piano, my first song was Yankee Doodle. I was fortunate enough to have many family members celebrate this small victory with me.
When I went in my 12-step program I would be in awe of people who were so far in the journey to me, and they kept reiterating to me that it’s a journey of 1 day. Take it 1 day at a time, and repeat that one day. “This disease is arrested one day at a time”. Over time you build habits.
If you want a Youtube audience, serve one person who’s watching your videos.
If you want more blog subscribers serve one person who’s reading your blog.
If you want a more fit body, don’t worry about all the things you think you’re going to have to do in the future. These things don’t exist and just clutter your mind. Think about being fit today and pushing yourself today and doing what’s hard today so that it becomes a habit.
The Number One Rule of Badass
The number one rule of badass is…you can never say “I’m badass”. The second you violate this sacred rule, all of your accumulated badassness walks right out of the door. It’s gone.
Other people can say what they want. Some might see you as badass. Some might think otherwise. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. In fact, your badass level rises the more you can remain non-reactive to other’s opinions. You can proclaim someone else or something else as badass, but never yourself. Do not violate this rule.
Think about people or characters you think are badass. It would be lame as hell if they themselves were to proclaim how badass they were. It would be like they’re seeking validation or confirmation, which would make everyone look at them like this ??
Let other people be in charge of those judgements!
You can think this in your head all you want. You can wear things you think are badass. You can do things you think are badass. You can THINK you’re badass. Just never utter the words “I am badass” out loud to anyone ever.
You shouldn’t have to say it or proclaim it. If you’re a badass, we will know!
Investments in People
It’s such a counterintuitive lesson, but the more you focus on others, the easier your needs and desires get met.
It’s counterintuitive because, if you were like me for a long time, it’s the last thing you might think to do while you’re in scarcity. When resources like money or food are scarce, a natural reaction is to hoard and contract and try to keep as much of the resources as you can. It really takes trust to be able to let go of the attachment to your stuff and be able to share and invest in others. It takes trust to expand when everything in you is telling you to contract.
A common trait I see with people with great social circles is they invest in people. People might be their highest investment. It might be listening to them. Spending time with them. Visiting them. Calling them up to see how things are going out of the blue. Sending them a message on social media. They respond when people have taken the time to engage with something they create. If they create a Youtube video, they’re in the comments acknowledging people. If someone in their offline social circle needs a ride they’re there. They might be volunteer. Whatever it may be, they take an investment in people. Though this investment in people, they build up social credit. If they ever fall on hard times, they have a great social circle to pick them up in places they need it.
Also, understand that there are some who aren’t a right fit for your investment. If you invest in people enough, you will gain a greater sense for neediness. For these people, whatever you do will never be enough, and you might find them draining. Let them go with love. It might take that for them to realize they have a lot more help than you.
There will be some who just don’t want your investment and/or don’t appreciate it. That’s ok too. Wear the world like a loose garment.
Get into the habit of making wise investments – not only with money but with your imagination, your creativity, your presence, your experience, your wisdom – you.
Deeper Connections
I’ve been seeing people say that they want deeper connections. They say their connections are shallow and/or would like to have friends that they can talk about deeper things with.
If you want deeper connections, dive deep into an area that has lots of meaning for you. What do you care about? What breaks your heart? What have you struggled with for a long time? What do you see other people struggling with that you’ve overcome…where you feel you could help them get to the next step? What is a shame you’ve had? What makes you cry? Emphasis on the YOU.
I actually wasn’t looking for deeper connections, but I found people that I deeply connect with. And it happened like an avalanche. It happened when I dived deeper into the things that meant a lot to me. That’s where I found the depth and the deeper connections. I connected with people who shared a similar depth of meaning in certain areas. What means a lot to you?
The first time I felt I made some deep connections was at CLW. I met many who were into alternative means of income (besides a boring job), heart-centered work and creating a lifestyle that aligned with what they wanted because that’s what the workshop was centered around. Everyone spent at least $500 to attend and most traveled their from other states or other countries! It was amazing to spend three days with people so committed to this vision. Heart-centered work and making it sustainable meant a lot to us. It still makes me smile when I think about how we connected.
After that workshop was done, I felt having a healthier relationship with food meant a lot to me, so I jumped in a 12-step program for food addiction and got help there. I met people who were farther along in the journey and did such an amazing job in supporting me through my journey. As I learned more and more I was able to help others…like people had helped me.
Deeper connections mean that you connect with depth. Where is there depth in your life? There’s a good chance that what you really care about has depth. Connect with people based on things you care about…your values…and you will find your deeper connections.
Being Authentic as an Employee
I declined an interview for a job today. Normally I would have accepted such an interview in hopes that I’d get this job. The main reason I declined was because I know what this job is going to do to me. I know what it will do to my character. It’s going to make me a way more reserved person. If I wanted to keep the job, I can’t be myself and express myself the way I wanted. It will stifle my creativity – which I have committed to for 2020. I could see my life becoming hella boring and flow going out of the window because I’m choosing to stay in a building for 8 hours a day. I’d probably be angry at the company politics. I’d feel like a slave.
I can hear voices saying “are you kidding? accept any job right now!”. I think my future self would appreciate that I stuck with my guns and learned how to navigate rapids without a job.
I’m aware this isn’t everyone’s situation and not all jobs are created equal. I’m sure there are jobs where you can truly express yourself and true expression might even be encouraged.
If you are an employee now, do you have to hide the real you to work there? Is it a place you can express the real you? or would you get fired for doing such a thing? What would your future self think looking back at your decisions today?
The world, including me, wants the real you as much as possible. Please give us more of the real you.
Maybe You Don’t Need Anymore Information
Here is the exact sentence that urged me to sign up for CLW. This workshop changed me! Up until then I had never spent that much money on an event or traveled to Vegas or anywhere west of Texas.
I want to invite you into an immersive environment where you can experience the necessary shifts for yourself. If reading about it was enough, then you’d already have done it.
As soon as I read that something in me knew that was an answer I needed. I wanted to make passive income, and I had read all the books and blogs and listened to the audio books and podcasts and watched the Youtube Videos. They’d make me feel good and inspired, but then I’d look at my life and feel deflated and in the back of my mind the thought that swirled around was “Ok…that’s great for you, but what about me”.
What I did need was some social interaction with people who were way ahead of me.
What this social interaction did was make things more grounded and real. I met some people who were making a full time living creating and selling online. We spent three days together and it made it much more real for me and made me feel that it was possible for me. And I’ve made passive income every month ever since that event three years ago. Now it’s not much, but I have no doubts that it’s possible. It’s not a lofty vision or a daydream anymore. Money actually gets deposited into my account because they made it real and also filled in a lot of gaps for me.
I was making passive income soon after that event, and it worked so well I thought…Hmmmm maybe I can solve other problems socially. I was fat so maybe that problem can be solved in a social way?
That worked too!
Eventually it led me to create Solving Problems Socially.
The work for me now is being able to contain all this aligned beauty.
Have you been listening to lots of audiobooks or programs or podcasts? Have you been reading lots of blog articles and books? These can help, but you ultimately have to ground the ideas present in them by your own experience or being around someone who is further down the path of wherever you want to go so success and progress can feel real to you. You can do that socially!