I didn’t want it, but I needed it

Sometimes there are people that come into your life where you perceive qualities they have as negative/bad/dark/evil. You might be hesitant to let that energy in, because you feel it’s not good or comfortable. BUT…if you were to really let that energy in and be with it for weeks/months/years, you might find at least in some way you needed that quality in your life at that particular time. It could serve as a disruption to your reality. It really works well if you aren’t enjoying your reality. This can open you up to a whole nother dimension.

I’m not talking about letting abusers in here. But maybe qualities you have labeled negative, that aren’t so destructive. For example curious. Many people might say being curious is being nosy. Or “bossy” is a label I used. Some might say a bossy person gets things done and is a great delegator.

If you haven’t had this experience, I’d say you just haven’t been exposed to enough different social experiences and/or people. This lack of experience could be due to just being young, or saying no to life’s invitations to experience this. It’s bound to happen with enough exposure to different social scenarios.

I’ve gone through rounds of this. In the beginning, I would stumble into these situations. Now, I’ve learned to use my intuition here after intuitively following it and it leading me to awesome places.

Football (American)

My first experience like this was football. I really had no “athlete” in me, but I had a lot of nerd in there. I wanted to have the experience of being an athlete. I guess after many times watching TV, I didn’t think you can be an athlete and be smart. I always saw athletes portrayed as dumb, while the smart people are the nerds/geeks. In real life that’s definitely not true. I needed that experience though to show me what my body was capable of physically. We trained hard. I also learned a lot about teamwork there. I played lineman, so my position counted a lot! I’m literally protecting the main guy, and the opposition can quickly point me out and exploit me if I’m the weak link.

4 Guys Living in a 1 Bedroom 1 Bathroom Apartment

The next biggest one was when I was 23, and a friend invited me to live with him. I said yes, and 2 other guys also came to live with us. At the time, I was pretty annoyed because he didn’t tell me the other two guys were coming to live with us too…in a 1 bedroom apartment!

I had so many reservations about saying yes to this. There were all kinds reasons to retreat and go back to comfort, but something told me “I needed this”, and I was so right. Living with them I learned so much about social skills, masculine energy, fun, courage, honesty, directness, cars, houses, construction, jobs physical work, delegation and asking and getting needs met, performing, women and on and on. It showed me all the things my upbringing was missing. I thought my upbringing was ok – HELL NAH. Sometimes I still sit and think about what I would have missed had I not said “yes” to living with them.

After this, I started really trusting the universe’s flow and my own intuition and the intelligence of the world – things I couldn’t necessarily see with my eyes. Going with this intuitive flow might lead me to a place I would never go on my own, but if I can trust it, it could lead me to a place beyond my imagination.

Maybe it’s a social problem?

Things just got way better from here. I actually started intuitively inviting uncomfortable things that I thought would break up my reality.

I went to a workshop about heart-centered ways to make passive income and that worked, but not for the reasons I thought. I met many people who were already making $10K per month passively, and it helped to ground that goal I had been dreaming of, and I actually started making passive income consistently right after that. This was after years of feeling like it was out of reach.

Then, I started thinking that since this worked so well – maybe I could ground other things that I felt were impossible through surrounding myself with people who had accomplished what I wanted to accomplished. Maybe my problems could be solved socially. So, I tried that in the realm of weight loss next and it worked again!!! Shout outs to foodaddicts.org! Another home run out of the park!

Crash and Burn

THEN IT ALL CRASHED DOWN WHEN I QUIT MY JOB 🙂 The passive income dried up and I gained all the weight I lost back plus much more.

Right now it’s feeling like I need to invite some more music and fitness together. Maybe like training for fighting. And also let more people in to the story now. AND I want to get back some of the great stuff that was there before. We’ll see how this goes.

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